Black Ice
by MasterMartin
Summary: Neera was always seems emotionless on the surface. A stoic, know-it-all panda who doesn't give much care. Team Lilac's members are sure there must be that fragile, emotional side she hides so well. But there is a world in the multiverse where this facade was destroyed by obsession, and a new Neera is to be born from the cracks. War Neera origin story, of sorts.


Black Ice

by MasterPerryMartin, 5 days ago

Literature / Prose / Fiction / General Fiction / Short Stories

"You're going to be okay, Lilac! You hear me?! You're going to be fine!"

"Define fine, for me. I don't think quickly bleeding to death is fine."

"QUIET, PRETENDER!"

The Glen. A rather generic name for a glen hidden in the Valley, but it worked. It was rather beautiful, actually. A small clearing in the otherwise dense forest, its grass a lush contour and a shade of verdant. The rocks, pristine and a beautiful type of grey. The trees parted all around, leading to homely hollows within the gaps between the trunks and sunlight beating down into the glen. And there was a river slowly running through the top half of it, splashes and the churning of the water against the rocks giving it a truly serene soundtrack. But that was not to last.

There was a padding of boots upon the grass as a figure rushed into the glen. A panda. A white furred panda, tall in stature and slender - perhaps too slender, dangerously so. Her white fur was dirtied and covered in splotches of oil, her normally immaculate black hair bobcut a complete mess. Her purple tunic, tattered and splattered with gore. Her black hobnail boots scuffed, her shirt ripped, her hands free from gloves and thus wounded. Her face spoke of stoic terror, like someone so very close to snapping, someone trying desperately to stay calm. In her arms she carried a dragon. A female, purple dragon, scales ripped from her skin and blood splattered around herself. Her white tunic was stained with crimson from a wound pouring out of her abdomen, but her shorts, boots and gloves remained a pristine cyan blue. Two tentacle-like tendrils spilled from her head, tied into one via a bandage. And then, from out of the thicket, came...another dragon? Perhaps the same one from another timeframe. She too was covered in blood, but this blood was from troubles long past, so dry and sticky it was and how easily it clung to her. Her black shirt was mostly clean, but her shredded brown shorts and red boots were not. She brushed her frizzy hair aside and blew an errant strand of her fringe out of the way as she trudged calmly after the two, her expression almost of amusement more than anything.

After all, War Lilac thought to herself, in what other world would she be so fortunate as to come across Neera Li, the panda prick, fall head-over-heels in love with a Lilac like herself? She had run over the entire sordid story back in the No-Zone Archives for shits and giggles, and boy was it something. A world where Neera would actually chase Lilac well into the Thermal Base, and was the one chosen by Brevon for interrogation. If that meant strapping her to a pole and shocking the information out of her, so be it. Hearing Neera's screams tied to the same torture she had went through made the bloodied dragoness wince in recollection, but yet gave off a feeling unlike any other she had felt before - smad, was it? She couldn't tell. It would be this universe's Lilac, a much saner individual not at all like herself, to bash the machine to bits and rescue Neera from the pain. It was unusual, really, seeing Neera's spirit break so easily, so much like her own. But it was enough for Neera to start subconsciously clinging to Lilac like a doll, even if at first she would never admit it. They became friendly at first, then close. Then closer. And closer still. Neither got further than that...just friends.

But then, disaster struck. Brevon wasn't going to let something like that let him pass, oh no. His precious stone taken back and out of men and power, he launched a final attack in desperation on the Shang Tu Palace. The team of heroines fought with all of their power, but Brevon was strong with nothing to lose. Carol and Milla, they...oh boy. Their ends were not pretty, let it be said. Even Gong got cut out during the battle, and it took both Lils and Neera to bash that alien asshat's face in for good. Now Lilac and Neera only had each other. War could see that look in Neera's eyes as she skipped over the days, months, then years. That look of...desperation. Of not wanting to lose anything else in your life, when you had already lost so much. She clung to Lilac more and more, her infatuation turned to terrible obsession. Her actions turned desperately violent if she was threatened or even separated. And once every now and then, she could see the flash in her eyes; a black flash, her pupils a deep red. She was to be a Warmonger, like War Lilac herself. It was...her destiny.

War had entered the universe a few days ago, meeting with old Panda Express to tell her all this, but she didn't want to hear it. She just got angry, lashed out, went crazy - you know, standard Warmonger stuff. She had been slowly losing her marbles, but it wouldn't happen on its own. It would need that extra kick to shift it into high gear. And then Merga decided to show up and make a mess of things. Perfect. And that was how they got here. Now they were all in a glen, Neera scrambling, her Lilac on the verge of death and bleeding heavily from a Merga-made abdominal wound, and War sitting here, waiting for it all to come crashing down.

Softly, gingerly, Neera sat Lilac down by the calming waters and planted her ice staff over her Lilac's wound. The head of the staff was coated in frost, and a soft crackling filled the air as the blood slowly attempted to freeze. Neera's face was still twisted in fear, but her Lilac's own a much calmer smile. As if she accepted her fate. Neera continued to freeze the wound, "It's okay, it's okay, it's gonna be okay! I-I can freeze the wound, a-and it'll heal on its own terms, no problem, right?"

"I mean, I wouldn't try..." War sighed, leaning against a tree, "That wound looks pretty fatal. Went through her skin, her stomach, even looks like it punctured her appendix. Looks pretty bad to me."

"SHUT UP!" Neera screamed, turning and firing off an ice spike towards the bloodied dragoness - who merely side-stepped it - before turning back to trying to close the wound. The blood was freezing, of a sort, but it wasn't turning solid - instead it was a sort of slush, a red slush that only melted soon after by mixing with more blood. It was freezing, but it was too slow, and melted too quickly. Yet she kept at it, gibbering softly to herself, "It's okay, I've got this, I can do this...oh god...oh god I can't do this..."

"N-Neera..." her Lilac gasped, stretching a hand out to touch her face, "It's okay..."

"IT'S NOT OKAY!" Neera screamed, "I CAN'T! FREEZE! THIS STUPID WOUND!" She tried again, more, adding more freezing through her staff, but it wasn't working, "FREEZE! PLEEEEASE!"

Finally, even the staff gave out. There was a flash as the staff exploded, snapping in two like a twig and sending the staff in two directions. The handle part flew back and hit War in the ribs, eliciting a small, "Oww..." from her, while the head bonked Neera and sent her reeling. She regained composure and then thusly lost it, clutching her Lilac tight, "No! NO! I...NO!"

"Neera..." her Lilac sighed, lightly brushing the side of Neera's ravaged face, "It's gonna be fine. Everyone's gotta go, one day. I've lived a good life."

"But..." Neera's face welled up with tears, "I wanted to save you. I wanted to save your life! So we could still be together, right? It...IT ISN'T FAIR!"

"Life ain't fair," War shrugged, "Neither's destiny, but here we are."

"She's right..." Neera's Lilac coughed, "Life doesn't like to play dice. This is where I die, so be it. I'm just glad I got to spend my final days with you. Remember when I saved you from that torture device? Heh...to think, I could've ended up like her..." she turned to War, "No offence..."

"None taken..." War shrugged.

"Please, don't go!" Neera cried, "We lost everyone else, it's just us! I can't lose another! I..." she broke down sobbing, "I love you..."

"And I love you too..." her Lilac hummed, "But it's time for me to go. I know War will take care of you. No more pain. For either of us. I promise..." she coughed violently, looking up the sky, "I...look forward to seeing Carol and Milla again..." she sighed peacefully, giving Neera a final kiss on the lips, "Good...bye..."

And with that, her body went limp. She was dead. Neera didn't react, at least not right away, so overwhelmed she seemed to be with emotion. War herself was trying not to cry, leaning against the tree and wiping any tears that may have leaked out with a cloth. The other Lilac's body remained still for a few seconds more, then began to...glow. Her body was glowing, a bright white light, before it seemingly began to dissolve. Parts flaked off of her corpse, transforming into red petals, the symbol of life and vitality in Avalician culture. Before long, her entire being had transformed into a mass of petals, flying high into the sky, dancing across the winds with those of her friends. Forever.

Finally, Neera snapped. She collapsed in on herself and slammed both hands onto the stone in rage, screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOOO" and then deafening sobs. War studied the scene for just a little bit longer - it wasn't every day she got to see Neera break down like a baby in this manner. Like, supposedly other Lilacs had told her that they had see Neera cry herself to sleep some nights, but that was probably more from the stress of training. This was something very different. The raw emotion was...majestic. Perhaps a slight more nuanced than War's own turning, not that such really meant anything. War gingerly approached the crying panda, and attempted to console her. Keyword there being "attempted". As soon as she placed her hand on her shoulder (and long before she could get the slurred, deadpan "hey" out), Neera spun around like a wounded animal and punched War straight in the ribs. The impact sent her reeling and crashing to the ground, thankfully avoiding splashing into the water, before Neera resumed her sobbing. Getting back to her feet, War clutched at the impact area for a bit, groaning in pain. A Neera with normal emotions hit like a truck - a hysterical Neera hit like a land barge. She approached her again, and this time was successful in kneeling to her level and wrapping her arms around her for a hug. Neera, this time, returned the favour and turned to sob into War's chest.

"There we go, theeeere we go..." War sighed, uncharacteristically calm, "Let it alllll out..."

It took a few minutes for Neera to calm. War continued to hug her, slowly stroking the panda's ruined hair, lost in her own deep thoughts. She remembered what it was like to turn. The pain. The sadness. The rage. And then it was suddenly all over. The old guy dies in the mind, a new person walks away. One unbound by petty morality or even basic sanity. They...are reborn. Most turned alone and in pain; Lilac did, Carol did, Milla certainly did. But not this time. This time, War would make sure she was there for one of her own. Perhaps, she thought, had she gotten this support while breaking down watching her Milla dissolve into goo...would any of this had turned out differently? Finally, Neera's sobs slowed and she clung tighter and tighter to War. She grinned in response, "There we are. Feel better?"

"I'm..." Neera sobbed, "I'm sorry...I don't...I wasn't always this...that was..."

"Unprofessional, I know," War joked, "Think of all of the other Neeras across the multiverse. Think of how livid they'd be? A Neera showing emotion?! Repent, not-robot!" War chuckled at her own joke, but Neera's tear-stained face did not. War bowed her head slightly, cracked-and-black horns drooping, "Yeah, yeah okay that probably wasn't funny, was it? I'm sorry. Alright, let's get you to your feet..." she stood, getting Neera to her feet too. Neera's body felt limp in her arms, like she didn't want to stand, and wouldn't be if she wasn't being forced to. War brushed hair out of Neera's face, her eyes wavering in colour, "Well, how do you feel?"

"I..." Neera said, her voice a hoarse whisper, "Something feels...wrong. I feel like something's changing. Or coming to change ME."

"Yeah, that's probably just your soul unlocking, slash breaking in two," War said almost casually, "No biggie."

"I don't..." Neera said, "I feel like I'm dying...but perhaps I want to. I don't want to feel like this anymore...I don't want to go on...without my Lilac..."

"Hey, hey, it's fine..." War shushed Neera's sobs, brushing her hair again. She could feel it herself. The deep recess of Neera's soul was cracked like an egg. It wouldn't be long now, "It's okay. Trust me, I'll take the pain away..."

And then, having Neera take War's hands in her own, War pulled her into one final hug as the changes finally started to happen. Normally these transformations were quite violent. A bit like Regeneration - a burst of energy that destroyed all around it as whatever remained of the old person was dissolved. But not this time. This time War could use her own powers to suppress some of the more...explosive effects, which she did so. There was still a violent hum as light blue winds circled around the two like a storm, and more light blue light erupted from Neera's body - through her mouth, her eyes, her fingertips, anywhere it could. War could feel Neera's soul unlock, and then instantly scream into overdrive - corrupting, gaining obscene amounts of power, shattering. Neera screamed in agony, feeling the wretched energies course through her veins, and then slice into her brain and heart. She felt like she was burning up, like actually on fire, and she clung ever tighter to War for support as the winds turned from light blue to a dark red. War continued to hold the screaming panda as her legs buckled under the pain and she started to go limp once again.

Eventually, however, the winds and the lights slowly faded, becoming weaker and weaker until they no longer were. Neera's screams likewise toned down until she was merely grunting in mild discomfort, her legs still incredibly limp. Finally, it all ceased and War was left cradling a weakened, panting Neera. Neera took a tight grip and attempted to steady herself - first the left foot, then the right - until she was standing up right. She broke from War's embrace, and opened her eyes - perhaps for the first time, once more. War looked almost proud; Neera's eyes were now the same shadowed black that her's were, with piercing red pupils bouncing around inside of them. Her teeth were sharp like shark teeth, and her hair frizzled and wild. She was...laughing. Giggling, really. Her expression no longer bore sorrow, instead being one of a deranged joy. War knew the emotions coursing through Neera now - anger, sadness, and yet...a calming void. The same she felt, for ever so brief a time, before her rage at Brevon pushed her to her murder spree.

"Are..." War stammered, "Are you okay now?"

"Okay?" Neera snapped her gaze towards War, her expression still of crazed joy. She felt so energised, her mopey face gone and a spring formed in her step, "I'm better than okay. I feel...great! I feel powerful, and embraced, and whole, and godlike and alive! I feel so...alive!" She took a hearty breath of air, "WOW what a rush!"

"That's corruption for you. Evil feels goooood," War chuckled, placing both hands on Neera's shoulders, "Welcome to the family, Neera."

"Great to be here," Neera giggled. Her heart was thumping, her head was pumping, she felt like she was going insane and wanted to kill literally everyone, but she didn't care. Not right now, "SO! What now?"

"What else?" War chuckled, gesturing back into the clearing, "Merga's still out there, after all. Ain't gonna choke on her own entrails by herself, is she? After you."

Neera cackled like a crazy woman - because she was, and the two sprang back through the forest, towards the danger, leaving the calming sloshing of the glen's waters behind them. And all was silent once more.

-  
"So, that's the new girl, huh?"

"Yeah? Gotta have a Neera eventually, right?"

"...Panda lady."

"Y-Yes, Milla. Panda lady."

"The bitch who chased you all over Jade Creek? Not my first choice for a new teammate."

"She's fine. Damn, you should've seen what she did to Merga. Whew! Ain't no way she's coming back from that!"

"...Did you not kill your Neera, Lilith?"

"Y-Yes. I did. But what's a little murder between friends?"

"A lot, seemingly. Oh, hark! She awakens!"

There was a soft groan as Neera slowly came to - and a few more as she began to actually wake up. Vision blurry, tongue dry, ears twitching, nose continuously picking up the scent of baked beans. It was hard to tell where she had even been for the last six hours. She remembered turning...nothing before that, of course...then her and War Lilac rampaging through Merga's forces, and perhaps a few of Magister's. She did remember Merga's end - gutting her like the glorified fish she was with her own frozen innards...somehow. Like, how could she gut Merga if she was already gutted? Whatever, she did it. And then...did she pass out? Or black out? She couldn't remember. Her vision slowly stopped being blurry, eventually sharpening to normal, allowing her to sit up and see where she was. Seeing through Warmonger eyes was...weird. It was tinted a little, black...maybe red. Things seemed to quiver and there was always the feeling of someone hiding just out of sight. She looked around; she was...somewhere? At a campfire, that much was certain, the fire itself in the middle of a ring of people, a soft crackle filling the air and the embers dancing into the night sky like petals. Five more people circled the fire, all people she recognised and yet...didn't. Like they were all deranged, all broken, like she was.

There was War Lilac, still in the same getup as back in the glen. Though upon further inspection...was that Spade's clothing she was wearing? Huh. Then there was Carol, Lilac's best friend, sitting next to her. She was wearing few clothes and her entire right arm was replaced by a mechanical copy. She too had the weird look in her eyes, and a stifled grin on her face. Next to her, staring into the fire, was that small dog Milla. And she was in quite the state - unkempt hair, scars and bruises, metal prongs taped to her arms and a backpack strapped to her back, an expression that stared into nothing. She looked unhinged, perhaps moreso than any other there. Then there was that accursed leader of the Red Scarves, Spade. This one was...slightly less intimidating than he would be, wearing clothing that could best be described as flamboyant. Well, that and a cape made out of someone's fur. Eew. Oh, and Kamina shades, as well. That was weird. Then, finally, was someone she was only vaguely aware of. Was his name...Torgue? Toupee? Terry!? She didn't know. He was like that Shellduck Lilac had with her in the palace that one time, only without the bill. And encased in dark orange power armour that made him taller than anyone else at the fire. So, not at all like a shellduck, really.

A lot of them were doing different things - some cooking things on the fire, some staring directly into the fire. But as soon as Neera groaned herself awake, they turned to look at her with varying looks on their faces - Lilac with calmness, Carol with excited fervor, Milla with...nothing, Spade with a flamboyant grin and the shellduck with a stoic smile. Neera's ruined mind ran a few miles trying to figure out what was going on, but ultimately she sighed and started to talk. The tone of her voice was not at all what it used to be like, or how she remembered it, but she spoke nevertheless; "So...where the hell am I? What's going on?"

"Simple," Lilac sighed, placing her can of beans down and staring at Neera, "After we...rampaged through all of Merga's army and you made her choke on her own...uh, EVERYTHING, you passed out from exhaustion. As I did, to be fair...uh, and then we dragged you here!"

"Consider this your...initiation," Carol spat, the words tumbling out of her mouth as if they were soup, "To our little club of crazy people. We got things alllllll prepared. Even gave you a little bath. I mean, let's be honest. You need one."

"We all need one," the shellduck stated matter-of-factly, his voice cold and stoic, "Our time on the run and our mental dispositions mean that cleanliness is often far from our minds."

Neera stared at the cast in confusion for a bit, then turned back to look at herself. She was not wearing her bloodied tunic anymore, it having been piled up just near the flames, and a cream blanket was thrown over her instead. She could feel that she was wearing only the basic underwear underneath. But she could also no longer feel the sticky cling of the blood that she was splattered with during and after the horrible fight, nor the oil and alien blood she was showered with after dealing with Merga. She was...well she hesitated to call herself clean, but not dirty. She noticed something nearby, glimmering in the dirt by the fire. It was a handheld mirror, like one would see in a hair salon. Gingerly, she reached down and picked it up, staring into her reflection. But it wasn't her reflection. It was a white panda, sure. Black hair frizzy, ears chewed, nose twitching, teeth sharp. But her eyes were black. A dark, soulless void in which two red pupils sat. The eyes of a savage, a crazy person. There was a nagging feeling in the back of her mind. She did not recognise this face, even as she stared into it. She felt...alien.

"This is weird..." Neera mumbled, touching her face and softly running her finger across her cheek, "I don't...feel like I'm me. Like I look at my face and I don't remember this."

"Yeah, that's the fugue state kicking in," Carol shrugged.

"The what?"

"Dissociative fugue," the shellduck motioned, "Loss of identity. We all have it."

"That's how it works," Lilac shrugged, her gaze turning back into the fire, "Trauma happens, old you dies, new you walks away and kills someone..." Neera bowed her head, too. This felt...wrong. And yet so right. A Neera who killed and was crazy? A criminal Neera? Of all the things. War turned back up to look at Neera and resumed a fake smile, "Ah, yeah! I forgot to introduce the others! This..." she turned to gesture to the crazed Carol with a single robotic arm, "Is War Carol! She has this really cool mechanical arm that can fire lasers and throw rocks everywhere! And she has...her version of me locked in the Dreadnought's hold. Yeah."

"I mean, it keeps her safe!" Carol guffawed, posing proudly, "Brevon cut my arm off and tortured ME instead of Lilac! And then I was forced to kill Milla, so I snapped and MURDERISED HIM THAT LITTLE PIECE OF..." she stopped her outburst, and attempted to calm herself. She failed and sobbed a bit, "Yeah...yeah...good memories."

"This is War Milla..." Lilac tried, but trailed off, staring off into the fire. Neera got another look at this dog, and even she recoiled slightly in absolute fear. There wasn't just nothing in her expression. Her eyes...her cold, dead eyes. Nothing, no being, ever screamed of such nothingness before in her life. No evil, no hate, no theatrics like Brevon. Nothing. Just...NOTHING. How was this driving her even more mad? How was this being possible?! She felt like a demon, hollow, someone who refused to acknowledge the basics of reality. War Lilac cleared her throat, "Word of advice. Don't EVER. Make her mad."

"Wh..." Neera stuttered, "Why? What happens when she's mad?"

"We don't know," Carol said, her voice also filled with fear, "We've never seen her mad. And we don't want to."

"Brevon forced the poor girl to murder both her Lilac and Carol while being this big old monster dog!" Spade giggled, "I don't even think there's a mind left to lose in there! She'd rather gut someone than look them in the eye. And that's on a good day, hoho!"

"She is...beyond even us," Lilac murmured, "We're not even sure she's on our side. A-Anyway, THAT..." she pointed to the posing panda, "Is War Spade. He's an asshole. And he wears a cape made out of his dad's fur."

"AND I killed my Lilac in a fit of anger!" Spade guffawed, "That is a very important detail."

"Okay, so..." Neera turned to the shellduck, "I have...NO idea who you are."

"War Torque," the shellduck mumbled, causing Neera to go "oooooh..." in response. He nevertheless continued, "I...may have witnessed Brevon kill Carol and Milla, then have Lilac blame everything on me. Ungrateful. I put an end to Brevon, and everyone else that caused me pain. No more evil assholes...no more..."

"S-So...those are all the Wars, huh?" Neera asked, to which most of them gave a nod - Milla didn't, of course, she continued to stare blankly into the fire, "Well...I guess I'm War Neera, then. The last of the main group."

"For now," War Lilac shrugged, "Until other people step up to the plate. I'll have a small army of crazy people before long, just you wait."

"So...this is me, now," Neera sighed, continuing to stare into the mirror and touching her face with a trembling hand, "A fugitive. A crazy person. A fugue state freak who doesn't even recognise her own stupid face!" she turned back up to the others, her face twisted into sadness again, "Why am I like this now? I felt so ALIVE when I was slashing through all of Merga's people! Why has it all come crashing down?"

"Because that's just what happens," War Carol sighed, "The adrenaline stops pumping, murder high goes away...and you're left to stare at this...hideous monster you become. And you just keep flipping between being crazy and being just lucid enough to understand what you've done...makes the madness seem like mercy, sometimes."

"Urgh, such melodrama!" War Spade scoffed, punctuated with a flip of his dadskin cape, "There are many advantages to being a Warmonger! Look at all this power we have now! We're all so much more badass than our old selves, and we get to go on the run and kill people and those No-Zone ruffians cannot do a thing about it! It's so much better than being a boring, dirty casual!"

"But what of the mental pain, you lunatic?!" Neera accused, "Does that ever go away!?" Spade said nothing, his expression shifting into something resembling deep thought. Neera began to cry a little as painful memories came flooding back, "How do you all deal with the loss? I can see her now. Staring in my mind. Holding my hand...dancing in the wind..." the mere thought of the petals in the wind caused her to sob, "I...I miss my Lilac..."

The sobs from Neera made the others uncomfortable, and they decided to wait a bit before anyone spoke. The campfire became deathly quiet, barring the crackling of the fire itself, an errant cough here and there.

"I mean...we all miss something. We're all suffering," War Lilac moped, "We're insane, we've lost our old identities and everything dear to us! I..." she began to tear up, "I miss my Milla..."

"I miss my arm," War Carol huffed, "Well, kinda."

"I...miss...Carol..." War Milla choked out.

"I miss my homeworld..." War Torque sighed.

And then War Spade was silent for a bit longer before, "...Nope, I'm good!"

"We all got shit on," War Lilac hummed, staring deep into the flames, "We were all chewed up and spat out by a multiverse that hated our guts. Nowhere to go but the gutter. To be who we are because some concept somewhere said it so. But now? At least we have each other."

"...So..." Neera sighed, getting to her feet, still in the blanket, "What do we do now?"

"Whatever the damn Hell we want to," War Lilac got to her own feet, grabbing a bag from behind her and walking towards Neera, "We ain't bound to any world. Any rules. Any laws. We wanna do something? We do it! Whatever it is..." she grabbed Neera's shoulder, "And whatever it takes."

"But...first..." came a creaking voice from behind them. They turned to see War Milla, her hauntingly empty gaze now pointed towards the two. She didn't so much look at them as much as she looked through them, somewhere in their general direction. Her voice was scratchy, pained and whispered, "Clothes...you look...filthy..."

"Y-Yeah, she's got a point," War Lilac sighed, shivering in something resembling fear and turning back towards Neera, "Your old tunic was splattered with all the blood. And that's fine, until it gets all sticky and starts to smell. So we got you some new clothes!" she gave the bag to Neera, who opened it and took a good look inside - there was a selection of leather biker clothes. A black tshirt, a leather jacket adorned with spikes, some jeans, combat boots, a leather...miniskirt? And some fingerless gloves with spikes on the knuckles. War Lilac chuckled, "Yeah, that miniskirt was...uh, Milla's idea."

Neera pulled a face that only a Warmonger could make and then sighed, "Yeah, whatever. Can you...not look? I mean YOU can look, but..." she gestured to the others, "Can you all turn around, please? I gotta get some privacy..." War Lilac shrugged and motioned for the others to turn around. They did so, though War Carol had to drag War Milla around like she was rotating in place. Shedding the blanket, Neera got to work getting dressed; first the jeans, then the shirt, then the boots, then the gloves, then the miniskirt and finally the jacket. War Lilac found it a little weird that Neera would let her and only her look. Perhaps Neera and her Lilac were used to dressing in the company of each other. Perhaps she just skipped that part of the recap. Whatever. War Lilac was always an "anything goes" type girl, so she certainly took the time to take in the view.

"Aww yeah, hun...didn't know Neeras were so ripped."

"I trained hard to protect my Lilac after Brevon was...dealt with..." Neera noted as she slipped the jacket on, "For all the good that did, am I right?"

Finally, Neera was ready. She turned to the group and they turned back to see her. Now she was decked out in the outfit, beaming with pride. Her expression befit her emotions. The leather ensemble fit like a glove ,and it made Neera feel all sorts of new. Now she was properly reborn, for real this time. War Lilac in particular smiled at the ensemble, but then quickly remembered something. She held up a finger, as if to say, "wait, one more thing" and she reached into her pocket and took something out. Sunglasses? At night? Oh well, if it was part of the costume, Neera shrugged. She took them and put them on. Things didn't seem so dark despite the conditions, but the group was now smiling in their own ways themselves. Neera's new red pupils pierced the sunglasses and painted the lenses with a red dot on each. It was a cool effect. War Lilac chuckled and jumped to her side, arm around her shoulder, "Look at my new badass friend, everyone! Look how cooool she looks!"

"You look spiffing, dear!" War Spade almost burst into applause, "Positively spiffing!"

"Yeah, you look pretty damn cool!" War Carol grinned, "No more stupid panda lady. Now our CRAZY panda lady! HAH!"

"I must admit, the clothing is an improvement over your old tunic," War Torque said poetically, "But there is one more thing left to do before this initiation can complete," and before Neera could ask what, he continued, "Your old clothes. The last symbol of the witch you were. You must throw them on the fire. Kill Neera. Forever."

"If you want to, of course," War Lilac motioned, "Don't worry about him, he likes to be...melodramatic."

Neera paused, meandering over to the old clothes she used to wear. They were sticky and stained in the blood of too many people to count. Lilac's, Carol's, Milla's, her own...Merga's somewhere. Just the sight of the garment brought a sickening feeling to Neera's stomach, and not just from the blood. She could feel the remains of her old self - her stoic, joyless panda self - cling to the tunic just as much as the blood. She saw everything - she saw the looks on Carol's and Milla's faces as Brevon's attacks did them in. She heard the screams Brevon made as she plunged her staff into his heart. She could see her Lilac's loving face, calmed in death. And she could hear something...a faint singing, coming from within. Words flashed in her mind, the final words of her Lilac pleading to let this new blood-coated one take care of her. She sighed. She knew what had to be done. Stepping forward, a single tear running down her cheek as she did so, she tossed the tunic onto the campfire and watched it burn. The iron scent met her nostrils as the clothes were reduced to ash, but she did not care. Her Lilac would have wanted it this way...maybe.

After the clothes were unrecognisable amongst the flames, she turned to the crew, who had gathered behind War Lilac, "It is done. Neera...is dead."

"I'm sure the bitch is in a happier place..." War Lilac said, taking Neera's hand and shaking it fervently, "Welcome to the crew, War Neera."

"It's..." War Neera sighed, "Great to be here."

And so, the group spent the rest of the night around the campfire; playing games, getting into squabbles, discussing the best way to open up someone to extract their organs without damage - you know, typical gossip stuff. The group could see and feel War Neera slowly get more into the conversations, butting in more and having more to say in general. They could already tell she was starting to see them as friends...well except for War Milla, but nobody really saw her as anything close to a friend. A rabid animal on a leash, maybe. After a meal of cooked beans, they started to settle in for the night, another damnably sleepless affair where each would battle their own demons. War Lilac knew how it felt - every night was the same for her, just her mutated Milla slowly decomposing and asking the same thing over and over. The same question...Why? She never really pretended to understand the science of it all - she wasn't even sure the whole thing about fugue states was correct - but she knew they were all broken in some manner. It didn't take long into the night for War Neera to start tossing and turning and crying in her sleep, pining for her Lilac and knowing she would never see her again. That obsession would perhaps go on to define her entire character, but as a crazy person, that was to be expected. She would awaken in the morning, eyes sore, heart heavy, mind rearing to distract itself with murder. Everyone else did that. As the panda calmed and fell into a slumber, the war dragon would too. She never expected to have the panda who technically even caused all this on the team...but hey. Tomorrow would bring training, to form the ice she once relied on the staff to create.

Black Ice. The same colour as her soul.


End file.
